A Dume and his money...
...are seldom parted. Yet there is to be an exception to this immutable rule, after all these years. My ancestors' skulls have all turned their faces to the wall in disgust.
Alienskin are running a competition. I will judge this, with my usual tender care. Fear not, I have warmed up the tenderiser. Take a look and enter if you dare. The prize is high. Cash, free clothing and publication, all in one. Winner takes all.
I'm only going to mention one rule here. Read the damn guidelines. If you don't follow the guidelines, not only are you certain not to win but I will personally sneer at you. I'll print the story just so I can tear it up and burn it. You have been warned.
In the new issue (out now - I forgot to mention that!) there are more Hall of Shame failures. It's bad enough being in there but responding to rejection with 'You can't reject me. I'm better than you' is just stupid. Yet there's one in that list who did. You know who you are. You are not barred from entering this competition but be aware that you've already biased me against you. So it had better be good, and it had better fit the guidelines with millimetre precision.
The rules don't say 'no poetry' but take it from me, poetry won't win. Alienskin's overall guidelines apply and one of those is...no poetry. Unless you can write an entire horror story in the style of Dr. Seuss. I'd really like to see that. Don't take that as a challenge unless you can do it really, really well.
I've scanned this issue's stories in case there were any toy stories already up. I saw none, but I haven't yet read all the stories so I might be wrong. If there are, well, you can't re-use them. No second-hand stories.
Read the guidelines, and read the article for hints. Then write. Then rewrite. Check and double-check spelling and grammar. Then send, and cross any crossable bits you might be blessed with.
Good luck, and remember - a Dume doesn't part with money easily. It needs to scare me more than the thought of parting with money.
Now that's scary.
